If thoughts aren’t facts, why do we believe them?

lbtherapy2
Jan 14
3 min read

Most of us have heard the phrase “thoughts aren’t facts.”And yet, most of us live as though they are.

“I’m not ready.”“I can’t do that.”“I’ll start when things feel easier.”

These aren’t truths – they’re thoughts.But they’re powerful enough to shape our behaviour, our choices, and the lives we end up living.

So why do we believe them?

Belief is often about safety, not truth

The mind isn’t designed to tell the truth. It’s designed to reduce risk.

Thoughts are influenced by past experiences, learnt patterns, emotional memory, and a nervous system that prefers what’s familiar. When a thought helps us avoid uncertainty or discomfort, it gets treated as useful – even if it limits us.

Over time, familiar thoughts start to feel factual.Not because they are true, but because they’re well rehearsed.

Questioning them would mean stepping into the unknown. And that takes energy.

Believing our thoughts keeps the status quo intact

Thoughts don’t just comment on our lives – they protect them.

If I believe “I’m not ready yet”, nothing has to change.If I believe “now isn’t the right time”, I can stay exactly where I am.

Belief becomes a shortcut. It allows us to maintain the same behaviours, the same coping strategies, the same internal world – even when that world feels uncomfortable or restrictive.

Doing something different doesn’t just require action.It requires processing:

new emotions
unfamiliar sensations in the body
updated beliefs about who we are

Staying the same is often the easier option.

A familiar example: exercise

Exercise is a good place to see this at work.

Many people know that movement helps them feel better – clearer, calmer, more energised. And yet, resistance still appears.

The thought “I’ll feel better after” lives in the thinking brain.

The resistance lives in the nervous system.

Exercise requires activation – increased heart rate, effort, leaving the house, changing state. Even positive change can register as a demand in the present moment. The nervous system is responding to now, not to how you might feel later.

So the mind offers thoughts like:

“I’ll go later”
“I’m too tired today”
“I’m not in the right headspace”

These thoughts aren’t facts.They’re attempts to preserve immediate comfort and predictability.

Believing them keeps everything as it is.

Why waiting to feel “ready” keeps us stuck

We often talk about readiness as if it’s a feeling that should arrive before we act.

But readiness isn’t a feeling.It’s a decision.

What we’re often waiting for is the absence of discomfort – fear, effort, uncertainty. But those sensations usually come with change, not because something is wrong.

Confidence, motivation and clarity tend to follow action, not precede it.

Resistance isn’t the problem

Resistance doesn’t mean you’re failing or lacking willpower.

More often, it means:“This matters, and something new is being asked of me.”

The issue isn’t that thoughts appear – it’s that we treat them as instructions rather than information.

A thought can exist without being obeyed.

How counselling can help

In counselling, we don’t try to get rid of thoughts or force change.

Instead, we slow things down enough to:

understand what your thoughts are protecting you from
explore the needs underneath your habits and behaviours
notice how your nervous system responds to change
practise choosing differently, gently and at your own pace

Often, people don’t need more motivation or advice.They need space to listen to themselves without judgement – and support to act in ways that feel aligned, rather than reactive.

Change doesn’t come from pushing harder. It comes from feeling safe enough to choose differently.